1️⃣👂How To Listen
What is Synchrony?
It is the degree to which you are synchronized with the person you are supporting. It’s your ability to listen to them and reflect back to them what they’re expressing.
We’ll explore in this training three layers of synchrony:
Mirroring what someone says = Linguistic-Style Synchrony.
It is about the words they say.
Mirroring how someone feels = Emotional-Content Synchrony. It is about the emotional tone they use.
Mirroring what someone means = Latent Semantic Synchrony. It is the meaning of what they’re communicating.
Imagine going to the eye doctor…
You step into the office with blurry vision, and it’s been causing serious issues at work and in life. You work from home, and overnight, your vision changed, and you can’t see your computer screen. You tried to push through it by squinting, but it caused instant headaches. You had to call in sick from work - you can’t continue living life this way.
You tell the optometrist your issues, and you’re hopeful they can solve it. But in the middle of describing your issues, they hand you a pair of glasses from off the shelf and say, “Here you go! You can pay billing on the way out.”
How could they possibly know what you need if they haven’t taken time to understand what the issue is?
When we support others, if we offer advice before we listen, we are that eye doctor.
Synchrony is learning how to deeply listen and understand someone’s thoughts, feelings, and beliefs. This is the first step we must take when supporting anyone, which will be your most important tool as a peer supporter.
