4️⃣Reframing
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Wife is mad at me. I've done something wrong.
After confronting her, she let’s me know she is sick.
I change from defensive to compassionate.
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I didn't hit my goals. I am a failure.
My go-to interpretation of broken expectations of myself. I didn’t make it.
But I made progress. The ball’s further down the field. I learned. I was courageous to try.
My first perspective paralyzes me; the reframe empowers me.
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I don't know anyone here. I don't belong.
I sit on the edges of the party next to the other losers who aren’t cool enough to know people.
A friend, observing the situation, sees me making conversation with someone who is left out and offers the reframe: you are an includer.
One perspective leads to shame; the other leads to strength.
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I didn't get what I wanted. This day is ruined.
My children find themselves deflated when their ideas for dinner are squashed.
In an ideal world where my parenting prevails over their discouragement, I’d tell them that having the opportunity to experience disappointment grows their resilience.
