Letting go of desperation: Therapist reacts to “Stranded” by Gojira
“A growing sickness in the heart
Defective, lack of control
The cure is somewhere in the silence
But I'm crushed by the noise inside.”
“Stranded” lyrics by Gojira
That first verse really punches you in the face, doesn't it? It’s relatable. I know that if I could just quiet down and chill out, it would be okay, but my brain is literally going a million miles a minute because I am so consumed by this feeling of not having any control over anything. My heart is in pain, I feel sick, and I'm in the dark.
This song feels like desperation. It's also catchy. But this song just feels like frantic desperation.
“No, don't lock the door on me.”
I am picturing someone pounding on the door, being like, “Don't lock the door on me. We can figure this out. You can't let us be apart. You can't let your fear win. You can't lock the door on me because you don't want me to see you this way, or you don't want to let me in and try to figure this out. You're killing me when you lock the door on me. Please, just let me speak to you. Please, just let me share.”
It's like this desperation and this fear that the other person won’t let you in. They're not going to let you in physically, but also emotionally.
That's so relatable when you're in a relationship with someone, romantic or otherwise. It’s that feeling of asking, “Please don't shut me out. I can feel you doing that, and I don't want you to do that. Don't shut me out. I want to be there for you.”
I feel that a little too loud right now personally, so maybe I'm filtering “Stranded” through a specific lens. If you feel that way, if you feel like you're frantically trying to be with someone, to be seen by someone, to see someone else, and you feel them pushing you away, please share on our support wall. That's what this community is here for. We want to support you.
This song is really cool because it takes you on a journey. The end is actually the answer to the beginning part of the song. It feels all-consuming. It's like, “I'm fighting for this person to let me in. I'm fighting because I'm feeling so anxious and overwhelmed that you're going to shut me out. And so I'm just fighting, fighting, fighting, like pounding on the door.”
Most people face their problems that way. Most people feel like they have to fight their anxiety, they have to solve it in some way. They have to fight the moment.
With “Stranded,” Gojira shows us the answer. Leave the moment alone. Just leave it alone. Take the pressure off, let it be.
There are things that we fight for, and there are things we have to accept we cannot change. When you are starting to feel that anxiety, that frenzy coming up in you, you can listen to this last part of the song.
“Leave the moment alone.”
Let it be what it's going to be. Accept it as it is. Leave the moment alone. Most people try to fight. Most people try to change, but right now, what you actually need to do is to leave the moment alone, to let it be.
That is so beautiful. I felt peace wash over me as I was listening to that “Leave the moment alone” verse, because it gives you something to do other than pounding on the door. It gives you an action to take.
It's not giving up. It's not quitting. It's allowing it to be hard, allowing this person to be in their process and to make the choice that they are going to make and standing firm. That's really hard to do.
I just want to cut that lyric, “leave the moment alone,” and play it on repeat over and over whenever I'm feeling anxious, because that's what we do: we try to fix the moment, and we just need to leave it alone.
If you want to be an encourager, if you want to be someone who supports the people who open up in the comments of our videos an on our forum, we need people like you. We’ll train you how to do it. Get started: heartsupport.com/swat
