• Kevin
    July 14, 2017 at 1:29 am #33035

    Good news is that I’m 1 month of being porn addict-free. Thank God for helping me on this. It’s really hard (like today was) to not give back in to it but I’m fighting it.

    My question is that my best friend had been on my mind for the longest time ever. And I kind of like, like her but I don’t she really like, likes me back. But I don’t know if God is maybe saying something to me that she’s not the one or maybe she is, or we’re just meant to be friends. It’s just kinda confusing knowing what kind of relationship we have. Could someone maybe explain what’s going on, if they know by any chance or just relate to this.

    Nate Hilpert
    July 14, 2017 at 1:26 pm #33044

    Kevin,

    Hey man, huge ups on your 1 month free mark. You’re killing the game, dude. I hope you feel free, feel excited, and notice growth in yourself already. The boost in productivity, the closeness and connection with friends and others, the enjoyment of normal day to day things, and just overall feeling more positive and healthy in life. I hope you’re feeling GOOD! Ha 🙂

    Re: the relationship question…I wouldn’t over-read things, man. I know the dance of “does she like me? does she not?” I wasted so much time when I was younger trying to figure that out BEFORE I did something. Truth is man, most people are too afraid of rejection to take a risk. And it seems like you’re a guy that’s really determined to make his life better, to grow, to become a better man. And I’d view this relationship as an opportunity to grow, an opportunity to take a risk, to overcome a fear, and to become a man that’s more confident in his own skin. If you like this girl, you should tell her, and you should ask her out. Because the worst case scenario is, she says no. And while that might suck at the moment, it sure as hell beats 6 months of obsessing over a girl that in the end isn’t even in to you. More often than not, the fact that you’ve got the nuts to ask her out will make her be more attracted to you and increase the chances of her saying YES. But even if she doesn’t, you’re increasing your OWN self-confidence, and that’s going to increase the chances of the NEXT girl liking you back. If you were to weigh the risk vs reward of this situation, there’s greater risk of NOT asking her out: wasting so much time, letting fear control you, decreasing your own confidence, learning to pass on risks, etc. And there’s so much potential reward FOR asking her out: saving time, conquering fear, increasing confidence, becoming more attractive not only to this present girl but to any future relationships because you’re growing in yourself and your own skin, and learning to accept risks. To me, it’s a no brainer…the only cost of asking her out is this: risking a one-time rejection. And if that’s the only cost to avoid all of the other risks of NOT asking her out and to potentially gain ALL of the other benefits of ASKING her out, I can’t see a scenario where avoiding it would be a better option. You got this, man. You’re a cool dude, and she would be lucky to have someone like you. Plus, if you really like her, again, worst case, you asking her out will flatter her and make her feel attractive and beautiful. Give it a go!

    -Nate

    Kevin
    July 14, 2017 at 2:56 pm #33047

    I’ll try it Nate and see how’s it goes and hope for the best. Thank you very much for the encouragement.

    Mini
    July 14, 2017 at 3:58 pm #33048

    Kevin,

    Well done on being addict-free it is a hard thing to do, but I always say this to people that panic that they feel as if they are addicted to Masturbation or porn. Too much is bad, but it is also natural to do it from time to time especially if you’re in the teenage years because hormones are changing at that age and you shouldn’t suppress your hormones.

    Well done!

    Kevin
    July 14, 2017 at 6:40 pm #33051

    Thank you very much Mini

    AVJR
    July 15, 2017 at 9:03 pm #33064

    Hi Kevin. It’s good that you are clean from porn. Even though I do relapse at times to watch it, I am doing my best to stay away from it. Let’s fight the battle before the battle, my man! Hehe. About your friend, you should talk to her. Be honest about your feelings towards her. Make sure you guys are calm, and comfortable with each other. I never told my feelings to girls. I’m hoping I will meet the one who loves me. Have a great night. 🌃

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